Before we master the emotional dimension, it is imperative that we understand the actual “end game.”
First and foremost, no person on earth can control their feelings; this is one of mankind’s biggest misnomers.
Think about it.
If you are walking your child across the street and they get hit by a vehicle, is it possible not to feel sadness?
If you are walking down that same street and a vehicle is chasing you and your child, is it possible not to feel fear?
At the end of the day, none of us can control our feelings.
What differentiates a warrior from the average person, however, is how one reacts to their feelings.
If the average person, while walking their child, is suddenly confronted with a violent speeding vehicle, there is a good chance their fear will debilitate them.
Their reaction, instead of grabbing the child and evading the vehicle, might more closely resemble a deer staring frozen in headlights.
A warrior, on the other hand, will feel the exact same fear as the average person.
However, that “feeling” will not only fail to debilitate them, but it will also improve their agility and nimbleness.
The so-called warrior feels the same fear as his fellow soldiers.
How they react to that fear is what actually makes them a hero.
Returning to our original points of differentiating and processing emotions and ascertaining an “end game,” we realize that everyone feels fear, sadness, anger, etc.
This knowledge becomes a tool for empowerment.
While the average person fights these emotions head-on, the warrior accepts these feelings, allowing them to come in and be processed.
If you could indulge me for a moment, I would like to share another dangerous and common misnomer: confusing fear with panic.
Panic is something we feel when we are tired, angry, and claustrophobic.
A good example is Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu.
Imagine being exhausted, wrestling with someone you really want to beat, and struggling not to be on the bottom.
Typically, what happens at this juncture is that physiologically, the heart rate skyrockets, we vacillate between hyperventilating and holding our breath, and whatever energy we had left is used up with reckless disregard.
After hours on the bottom, your fear will be gone.
As the biofeedback axiom goes, control follows awareness.
Therefore, the more we are aware of our feelings, the more we can control our reaction to them.
The more we are aware of panic, the more we can control our reaction to it.
I can tell you from 25 years of wrestling with the greatest Jiu-Jitsu proponents on earth that all of these people have one thing in common: the mastery of their reaction to their feelings.
This is the End Game!